July 22, 2019
It’s that perfect time of evening, when the sun has just dropped behind the horizon and the darkness is settling in. I’m in our backyard, staring up at the porch light, for quite some time. Simply watching and observing, fascinated with the amazing thing happening before my eyes. If in that moment my neighbors had decided to look over the fence, they’d think I’d lost it. I’d finally gone stark mad! Yes, they’d seen me talking to the birds, humming to the plants, waving to the squirrels tight-walking across the powerlines…. but this……this was different. Come to think of it, I suppose my behavior always seemed a bit bizarre to the city-folk. Laying in my backyard smelling a blade of grass, studying a beetle crawling along the hem of my dress, digging for worms along the sidewalk to feed my fledgling Robin. And there was that time I received a notice for allowing the weeds to grow up my shed walls- because I considered it “whimsical and quirky”…which apparently the neighbors did not (I had to later convince the city that yes I know how to do yard work, and I’m actually employed as a park ranger….who does that sort of thing every day.) But I digress. There I was- in our small, wind-blown and grassy little slice of freedom- standing on the porch staring straight up. Others may find me crazy, but in each moment I feel like it’s the right thing to do. To always explore and satisfy my ongoing curiosity. This evening it was an 8-legged creature that lured me in. Fortunately, not as it’s unsuspecting prey, but instead as a respectful onlooker hoping to gain insight into a secret world. I was absolutely mesmerized. I had the opportunity to watch it spin its entire web from beginning to end. The silken threads pulled gracefully from it’s abdomen by fast-working and expertly maneuvered back legs. The steady and meticulous process of dragging and weaving inch by inch the strong and sticky string. The skillful brilliance of this small critter to instinctively know what to do. What is a spider’s web? It’s a piece of art, it’s a means of food, it’s a home, it’s a habitat! A spider has the amazing gift of adaptability! Of being homeless one moment from a sudden gust of wind or clumsy hiker, to having everything it needs a few minutes later. Their web provides them a place to rest, a tool for hunting, and a way to capture dew for drinking. I greatly enjoyed this perspective, to see the beauty in what others may find terrifying or “creepy”. But why are we as a culture fearful of something who lives much like we do? To fight to survive, to protect what is ours, to retreat when scared, and work hard to get by. This little spider was doing just that….and I found it beautiful.
This evening as I watched I thought of my own broken web. Of our half-packed house and personal belongings tucked away in boxes. I myself was planning to adapt….to change locations that better suited us. Much like the spider that selected it’s setting, I was on the same mission. A few days from now we would be moved, and a few weeks after that a bit more settled in. For I had found a home, or rather a habitat, meant for the wild woman that I am! I am no creature of the city, though much like the spider I had managed to craft a happy life, but now I could truly embrace my nature, in nature- and thrive!
I am excited to now be the steward of our own land. The caretaker of a forest, and the life found within it; including spiders like the one I watched that evening. To tend and cultivate the soil, plant new trees, pick fruit from the orchard and brambles, and harvest vegetables from the garden I’m eager to plant. Growth and change are inevitable in life, much like the land surrounding us, but we are who we are because of the path we’ve each followed or been guided down. This chapter in my life was made possible because of the people (you know who you are) and places that shaped who I am. For all of those millions of moments I am truly thankful. If we are to embrace this life, I plan to live it to the fullest!
So here I am. A few weeks have passed since I started writing this- and August has arrived. We've lived in our new habitat long enough to realize it’s real. This is happening! Friends and family have come to visit and help us out. The boxes have been unpacked, the pup is familiar with where his food and water dish are kept, and we’ve begun to develop a routine. Each evening we walk the trails and visit the orchard; picking the blueberries, apples and peaches that are ripe and ready. We’ve learned where the biggest blackberries grow, where the deer bed-down, and we even stumbled upon a cottontail rabbit nest-with cute little fuzzies tucked inside. We’ve hiked up the hills, down the ravines, and over the small creek-where the bird’s nest mushrooms hide. We’ve seen bald eagles soar overhead, heard woodpeckers nearby, and watched-on horrified as our pup attempted to climb trees after the chittering squirrels- who loudly expressed their disapproval. Young praying mantis creep along the kinnikinnick, while the bumblebees and hobomok skippers enjoy the mint. This land has much to offer, and we are eager to continue our explorations. A change in scenery has brought with it much joy- though we won’t forget where we came from. I’ll miss the houses, apartments and townhomes I was raised in, the couches I crashed on, the tent I slept extended periods in, the bunkhouses and rooms I shared, and the travel trailer I moved from state park to state park. They are a part of me, and always will be.
So here’s to some new adventures, where the wild and the whimsy unite! (more to come)
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